To Frances Burney

Dear Miss Burney:

I stayed with you when Evelina Anville ran into Lord Orville while accompanied by some prostitutes at Vauxhalle gardens--that was pretty funny, after all. I even held on when Cecilia and Mortimer Delville kept missing each other in the streets of London until Cecilia was feverish and ALMOST DIED (in part I enjoyed it because that was probably one of the first times a dog was used in a novel to bring the couple together--but really, the name change/secret marriage plot line was pretty weak). But if you think that I am going to make it through 900 pages of angst about Camilla and Edgar when I know and you know and pretty much everyone in the entire books knows that they are in love--you are probably right--but I won't be happy about it.

What is it about sensibility that is so problematic for you, eh Fanny? Frances? Whatever. Couples, believe it or not, actually get together so much faster if they acknowledge that they like each other. All that keeps your couples apart is the fact that women in your novels are forbidden from showing that they care about anyone. I don't want to go all Marianne Dashwood on you, but that is just stupid.

I loved Evelina, I enjoyed Cecilia, but I am just suffering through Camilla. Let's face it--there were some big improvements in your genre after you. First of all, there were REAL impediments to matrimony that kept couples apart--like a wife in the attic, for example. Second of all, women could show emotion, but they didn't fall to pieces all the time. And most importantly--men are not either gods or cads. Miss Burney, you are like a male novelist in reverse, only instead of angels or *****, there are no gradations of men in between the prince charmings and the fops.

Anyway, props for writing Evelina and everything. And also, props for the great influence on Jane Austen. Giving her the title for Pride and Prejudice, if nothing else, should win our esteem. Also, a few choice phrases from you, I have seen before in other places. My favorite is "a word, a look" which Austen used in Persuasion. See also "She was firm where she knew herself to be right" which I believe is Pride and Prejudice.

Thank you for your time.